PAIN

I will not be beat down.
You are not in control of me.
Your dark soul cannot over power my hope, my spirit.
You will not destroy my light.

The painful grip of your words has bruised me.
The fear of your abuse engulfs me.
I hate your presence, your voice, and your words.
I don’t know why you ever returned.
There was a reason you left; there was a reason you were pushed away.
You wreak too much havoc to be allowed to remain.  

For so long, you and your ways have twisted this family.
Your deluded morals, beliefs and values had befuddled us and sent us raging.
I cannot see why anyone can stand being around your blackened soul.
……….

You will leave,
But your rape and pillage of our souls will remain.  
You are blind to your destruction, like a hurricane.
You blow in without warning, leaving us no time to prepare and protect ourselves.
You shatter the window’s glass, rip off the roof, crack the foundation, rip the doors from the hinges, and leave us crying and wounded as you furiously twist away.
But the disgusting thing is, some people can’t help but be awed by you.
As I watch their moldable mind being twisted and ruined, a tear drips down my cheek.
Another person is to be destroyed because you don’t know what you are.
You are vain and conceited and narcissistic.
You don’t see your blacked heart, your twisted flaws, or your evil ways.
You are just like the father who beat our mother.
You are like the man who put a gun to her head as she held your infant sister.
You are like the person who beat our mother’s body and mind senseless without remorse.
He is your idol, your god; he is the person you have become.
You are ruthless and you will not leave until all our ties are undone.

…………

I cannot stand you.
I cannot stand your father.
You have hurt us all so much.
You have continued to hurt us though we had forgiven you.
My bruises have faded, my tears have dried, but the scars on my heart still ache.
My heart is alight with the fire you set upon it.
You have held me down for the last time.
You will not beat me like your father beat our mother.
You will not rip away my happiness, my character, or my self-respect.
The deep chasm of distrust, hatred, and anger your have created cannot be filled.
You have no right to hold me down or make me feel helpless.
Just because you are man does not mean you can beat a woman.
You are nothing to me anymore.
I have tried so hard to love you, but this time you are beyond forgiveness.
Our sibling bond is gone.
Our fellowship is broken and I will not mend it.